public enemies

I've lived in cities all my life and every one of those cities has had it's "wildlife". . .
In New York it was pigeons, rats and roaches.
In Philadelphia (where we lived on the suburban outskirts) it was racoon, wild turkey and deer.
In the southernmost city it's free-range chickens and "snowbirds".

Now, pigeons and rats and racoons and deer, somehow figured out how to co-exist harmoniously. But free range chickens and "snowbirds"?. . . not so much.
The reason is, "snowbirds" are humans (imagine that, humans who can't get along).

You see, every year, just after the holidays, a flock of these "snowbirds" migrate south to our tropical paradise to escape their primary nesting places like Minnesota, Wyoming or New Jersey where the winter weather gets "too cold" for them. They stay for three or four months and then migrate north again before the sub-tropical summer kicks in and it gets "too hot" for them. But while they're here, with too much time, money and northern anxt on their hands, they declare war on the chickens.

The gaggle gathers at Old City Hall to whine in a unified voice. . .
"The hens and chicks dig up our professionally fine-trimmed lawns and gardens!"
"The rooster's early crowing wakes us long before our hangovers have worn off!!"
"Make it stop or we'll sell our houses and never come back!!!"
(lions and tigers and bears, oh my!!)

With a greedy eye on keeping the property tax money flowing, the City Commission bends for the bucks and hires a "chicken catcher". At a bounty of $25 a head, he or she sets traps to capture as many of the public enemies as they can and ship them to a safe haven "chicken ranch" in North Florida that no one has ever found. (I promise, I'm not making this stuff up)
Of course it never really works, the chickens are still, and always will be, here. But for a couple of months every year it's a great show at the local taxpayer's expense to keep the "snowbirds" coming back to poop in the pond.

A dear friend of mine, Katha Sheehan, owns and operates "the chicken store" here in town.
She is the expert and the chicken's champion. Take a look at
The Chicken Store.com