Tuesday, March 23, 2010

3-1/2 inches of rolled nonsense

By now I'm sure I've mentioned that about three weeks ago,
I stopped smoking.
(. . .no worries, I'm not gettin' all up on a soapbox here.)

Most friends mean well when they say, "congratulations!" or some such but, in my case, I'd honestly be happy with, "well it's about damned time you dopey bastard!"
I mean, all those years and all that money spent on something I always knew I never needed to be doing in the first place.

Now, I know there's a smorgasbord of "smoking cessation" plans, programs, treatments, strategies and support groups out there and a person hoping to quit can chew gum, suck lozenges, take pills, wear patches and/or go to meetings (most with money back guarantees).
I know also that those processes and aids have worked pretty good for lots and lots and lots of ex-smokers.
But me, I don't roll that way.

I made a conscious choice, all those years ago, to bum my first cigarette off my sister (it was menthol) and I made a conscious choice to burn my last smoke and say, "no more".

Feeling good about my choice, I went on-line to find out what happens to someone who stops smoking. . .
. . .Within 20 minutes, blood pressure drops back down to normal, in 8 hours the carbon monoxide levels in the blood drops by half and oxygen levels return to normal, after 48 hours all the nicotine has left your body, the chances of a heart attack decrease and senses of taste and smell return to a normal level. . .

Well, maybe all that's true, but let me tell you
what really happens. . .

You get tired in the middle of the day for no good reason.
At first, that really bummed me out but then I thought,
"hell kid, you live in paradise, take a damned nap!"

Then, you find yourself with more time on your hands 'cause you're not hanging out having a cigarette. So the next thing you know the house is clean, the car's washed and the first 4 chapters of the novel you've been planning to write for the past 5 years are finished.

. . .And forget about food! It tastes different and it smells funny. I've been cooking for myself most of my adult life and all of a sudden I'm asking, "what the hell is that smell?"
And coffee just tastes like mud! (yeah I know - It was only ground this morning) I brew my espresso black and strong and with a cigarette it went down easy, but after smokes. . .
I've heard of something called "tea", maybe I'll
try some of that.

And then psychologically. . . there's a sense of peace.
I kid you not, while I smoked, there was always anxiety attached to it;
. . .When's the next smoke? How am I gonna rearrange my day so I go past the bodega to get some more? No, I can't get them there they cost too much! Do I have enough for the overnight?. . .

For me, that was the deal breaker.
Being governed by something other than my own will, put a bad taste in my mouth. (a taste worse than the tobacco)
So, at the end of the day, I chose to spend more time in conscious behavior and less time making like a married man to 3 1/2 inches of rolled nonsense.


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Anonymous said...

Loved this blog! Thank you for sharing very real anecdotes. I hope to quit soon myself, and find your experience to be extremely helpful.